filmfucked
Sunday, April 10, 2011
KABOOM (2010) ROB
HOBO WITH A SHOTGUN (2010) ROB
Thursday, March 31, 2011
We Are What We Are (2010) ROB
Wake Wood (2011) ROB
The most common comparison I've seen while anticipating this films release has been Pet Semetary and while that's not way off base I think this bad boy is in a different league.
Monday, March 21, 2011
The Wild and Wonderful Whites of West Virginia (2009) THUGGY
Most people that know me have heard at one time or another that my dream in life is to strike it big, buy a tricked out double wide with all the fixings, and move into a trailer park somewhere. I’m not sure how or when I began having this urge, but I assume it has something to do with my early childhood. Though I have never officially lived in a trailer park, my family did have an eight acre ranch in Albuquerque, NM that I spent a goodish amount of years at when I was a young whipper-snapper. This property looked like a mix between a junkyard, and a machine-part graveyard. Rusted out hulls of old cars and various unidentified metal was stacked haphazardly everywhere. So nowadays whenever I see places like that it gives me that familiar nostalgic kick in the cod-piece. For example, I am a big fan of “American Pickers” for such reasons. Uncle Douvee’s house from Van Damme’s “Hard Target” and "Old Lady" Hackmore’s place from “Earnest: Scared Stupid” also come to mind. Bottom line is that I want a lot of scary looking junk lying around, and I want the “Man” to stay off’d mah property!!!
The Wild and Wonderful Whites of West Virginia is a movie that I skipped over for months before this recent watch. Because I don’t have a new-fangled flat screen HDM whatever the fuck T.V. it’s next to impossible to read the new Netflix formats screen text. So I rather innocently assumed the movie was about some West Virginian prison and their Aryan Nation population and subsequently blew it off… Jokes on me.
The Dub and Dub Dubs of Dub V is actually about a legendary Boone County family that gained prominence in the mid-1980’s because of D. Ray White, the family patriarchs unbelievable talent in Appalachian “Mountain Dancing”. For those of you who don’t know what Mountain Dancing is (Don’t worry, I had to look it up myself) It is a sort of mix between clogging and tap-dancing that has been popular in Appalachia and other southern nations since this countries inception.
In the early eighties The Smithsonian Institute bankrolled a PBS documentary titled “Talking Feet: Buck, Flatfoot, and Tap in which D. Ray White was featured prominently, touted as the best Mountain Dancer in the United States. Unfortunately D. Ray was killed in a shootout before the movie was completed… He was fifty-eight years old… Amazing… This man was a G.
In 1991 PBS did a follow up documentary called “The Dancing Outlaw” on D. Ray’s son Jesco White who assumed the mantle of “Best Mountain Dancer in America”, instantly launching the White family into the type of fame only two PBS documentaries can provide. Hahaha.
“The Wild and Wonderful Whites of West Virginia” a Dickhouse production (Jackass) opens with various Boone County officials commenting on the families’ colorful and notorious nature. We are then introduced to Mimi White the self-proclaimed “Biggest and Baddest” of the White family, followed by Bertie Mae White(D.Ray’s Wife)”The Miracle Woman” because she raised thirty some-odd kids, Susan Rae White A.K.A. “Kirk”, then on to Sue Bob White, Bo White and so forth. Hank Williams III a close family friend comments on their legendary family throughout and provides much of the films soundtrack. Apparently The White family has been the subject of countless famous country and bluegrass songs and it is made quite obvious in the film. I loved this movie; I put it on around 3:00am and had Too Much Fun watching it. The family is outrageous, they smoke “the pot” around children of any age, and they snort prescription pills wherever they please like it’s going out of style. Cousins steal husbands and tear up each other’s houses; nephew’s shooting uncles, women talking about chopping people up and throwing them down mine shafts, and the flare with which they do all this is literally incredible. The Taco Bell scene needs to be seen to be believed and “The Boone County Mating Call” is priceless.
In all honesty, these people seem dysfunctional to “normal” folk, but in my humble opinion I feel like they might just be more sane then the majority of American families with all their resentment, deceit, and depreciation of self-worth. This family is going to hell as they themselves say, but they’re going to have a fuck-all of a time on the way there…
Clydesdale Scale: 2 Star…. I fucking loved this movie!!!
Rhipt Fuel: Afgoo Purps
Rhipt Viewing Rating: 1/5
Friday, March 4, 2011
RUBBER (2010) ROB
Sunday, February 20, 2011
Let Me In (2010) THUGGY
Alright, before I get into this review I’d like to take the time to express to our readers that I am an AVID horror fan. A regular freak since childhood for all things terrifying and macabre, so when I hear classic horror (albeit a very recent classic) is being remade I usually find myself in fits of rage, cursing these Hollywood whores for their feeble-minded and cow-hearted outlook on profit vs. concept. Sadly this is not a new trend, as there have been around five-hundred and twenty-one movie remakes since films inception in the 1880’s. Now this is not to say that I abhor remakes… Hell, I spent most of my younger years thinking Bob DeNiro was the one and only incarnation of Max Cady in the ’91 version of Cape Fear, I just feel classics are made by risk and innovation… Bottom line is I came to this film assuming it would drown inside the massive size 15’s of “Let the Right One In” the 2008 Swedish masterpiece based on the book by John Ajvide Lindqvist…. Now get ready purists…. It did not.
For all of you film fans out there who haven’t seen “Let the Right One In” tsk tsk… The premise of “Let Me In” is this. Young Owen, a lonely and bullied middle school kid who is being raised by his mother due to an impending divorce finds himself the unwitting neighbor of Abby, a barefooted vampire child and her nameless father figure who’ve just moved in next door. Owen, left to his own devices due to his mother’s increasing despair and alcoholism spends most of his time after school in his apartment complex’s courtyard eating candy and stabbing trees, envisioning revenge upon his schoolyard bullies. It’s during one of these nightly forays that he first meets his new neighbor. Their interactions are at first cold but curious as she tells Owen she “Can’t be his friend”, but it is a small courtyard and they inevitably become strange allies, each looking out for one another in their own ways.
The film then cuts back and forth between Owen and Abby’s respective home lives. Owens being the solemn existence of an only child, constantly harried at school by a bully whom in my humble opinion is a bit over the top. Abby’s of course being the curse of having to spend her days in deep slumber locked in a darkened bathroom while her “father” makes his nighttime runs into town to abduct and drain locals of their life-blood. The “father” who we can only assume has been doing this type of work for god knows how long, coupled with his charges budding interest in Owen becomes sloppy, forcing Abby to hunt for herself leading to a string of very public murders and attacks which garner the attention of “The Policeman”.
As I’ve said, I began this film with apprehension and bias being a huge supporter of the original film, but was pleasantly surprised by the film being set in the early eighties during the dead of winter Los Alamos, New Mexico. I myself spent a portion of my childhood in Albuquerque and know firsthand the remoteness you feel there. Director Matt Reeves (Cloverfield) does a fantastic job keeping his camera still and creating a somber atmosphere to spin the tail of these two tragic characters, isolated in their own ways from everyone but each other. The shots are dry and desaturated, giving the film a cold feel that compliments not only the time of year, but also alludes to the fact that our Abby is very much; undead. I have to tip the old hat to Chloe Moretz who plays Abby, for her perfect portrayal of sorrow. She does not have a back story, she does not explain why she drinks blood, save for that she will die if she doesn’t. I was surprised to find out that she also played Hit-Girl in last year’s Kick-Ass, I didn’t make the connection at first because the two characters are polar opposites, and of course she isn’t wearing a mask the entire movie. Depicting Owen is Kodi Smit-McPhee (The Road), a great choice for the character in my mind because he sort of has the same look as Kåre Hedebrant who played Oskar in “Let The Right One In”, McPhee also nails his part adding to the sadness of the film. Abby’s “Father” is portrayed by Richard Jenkins, who has enjoyed a fairly full career appearing in movies like The Witches of Eastwick, Something About Mary, Me Myself & Irene, Step Brothers etc... The twist is that he is usually plays authority figures, professors, judges, and law enforcement types, so to see him placing jars of acid in his ruck-sack before going out to stab people in throat is oddly fantastic. Rounding out the main cast is none other than Elias Koteas who first won my heart decades ago with his portrayal of Casey Jones in the Original Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, that and his part as Azazel in Denzel Washington’s “Fallen” solidified him in my mind as a bad ass. In this film he plays the straight man, a strictly by the book cop who obviously believes in his work, and is good at it.
The soundtrack is “rad” if you will, featuring classic 80’s hits from David Bowie, Culture Club, Blue Oyster Cult and others. Even now, a good two weeks after watching the movie (procrastinator deluxe) the thought of Blue Oyster’s “Burnin For You” playing in the background during one of “Fathers” truly terrifying abductions brings tears of joy to my eyes. There is CGI in the film which I could have done without, but Abby’s kills are fucking brutal, exactly what I would imagine a Vampire attack would play out like in real life, none of that soupy seduction stuff. Multiply all this with Reagan America’s “Satanic Panic”, then add it with being in a language I can understand (that’s not to say that I don’t watch foreign film, it’s just the subtle nuances that come with that subconscious “non-think” of the native tongue put me in a slightly closer place than the original), and you have a piece of American Horror that one can be proud of…
On the Clydesdale Scale I give this movie a 2 star
Rhipt Fuel: Grandpappy Purps
Rhipt viewing rating: 2.5/5